May 26th, 2013

Scribe

Shoulder irritations, and frustration with the internet

I hurt.  Sometimes more, sometimes less, but the last few days have been an exercise in wishing that the surgery is NOW, rather than August.  I hurt.  When it doesn't outright hurt, it aches.  I sleep by an hour here and there before the pain wakes me up, and I don't think that I'm ever getting any deep sleep.  As a result, I'm tired and cranky all the time.

I'm working on some slightly overdue invitations right now, and it's clearly the last calligraphy I'm going to be doing for quite a while.  I have very poor body mechanics, and the way I tighten up my shoulder isn't helping the ache.  So once this is done, so am I until such time post-surgery as I'm allowed to fire those muscles again.  I've hardly been prolific, but it's one thing to not wanna, and another to not be able to.  Annoying, that.

I'm also HUGELY annoyed with the way the internet is failing me.  I want to be prepared for this - I HAVE to be prepared for this, because once I come home after surgery I'm stuck with whatever I've laid in - I won't be able to drive for probably at least two month afterwards.  So I've turned to the internet.  While there are a few helpful posts, by far the vast majority fall into these categories:

Medical websites: these have two categories of information.  "Understanding your rotator cuff surgery," which gives you a small amount of anatomy and a very brief explanation of the surgery; and "Understanding your recovery" which tells you that you'll have a sling and do physical therapy.  Gee, thanks.  I knew that much already.

People posting about how it's the most pain they've ever been in, OMGOMGOMG.  Pretty self explanatory.

People posting YouTube videos about how well they feel post-surgery, and how important PT is.  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Whatever.

People posting all about their PT - what exercises they're doing, how they're doing them, and hoping to get back to the gym as quickly as possible.

Sites that claim to offer "tips" that basically just say "you're going to need a lot of help."

None of this is useful.  I want to know things like "buy an electric toothbrush and a button hook" and "put your shampoo in a pump bottle."  I have found a very few sites that actually offer decent advice (like the afore mentioned things) but they're few and far between.  The thing that is REALLY driving me nuts is the commentary on bras.  Two really annoying things struck me that I won't be able to do - fasten a bra, and put in my contacts.  The comments on like are things like "for women who insist on maintaining their vanity," or "for women, forget your vanity.  It's no time for wearing cute underwear or bras."  Okay.  Maybe for SOME women bras are about vanity.  But for some of us they're about being pain free.  Chafing is No Fun, and I can't fathom adding another excruciating pain to the post surgical experience.

I'm just grumpy.  I was hoping for some wheat amidst the chaff.