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Bummed

The more I read about rotator cuff surgery, the more bummed (and ever so slightly panicked) I feel.

Disclaimer: I am putting the theoretical horse before the very real cart here.  Haven't spoken to the doctor yet.  Won't for another fifteen days.  I'm just doing my due diligence on the internet (with all of the misinformation to sort through) so that I have a vague hope of making informed decisions and understanding what they tell me.  But I'm fairly certain that I'm looking at surgery, whether or not there is a stint of PT ahead of it.

It's a long recovery.  Looooonnnnngggggg.  That creates two major issues.

The first is Pennsic.  Pennsic is currently twelve weeks away for us (HOLY CRAP!!!!)  Pennsic with my shoulder immobilized is just a criminally dumb idea.  Messing up my shoulder permanently in order to go to Pennsic should win me a Darwin Award.  If they were to schedule me immediately so that I would be out of the immobile phase and into assisted PT, "taking a week off" from the scheduled PT would be only slightly less stupid.  It's slightly less stupid because presumably I could do it on my own, but I have to think that at the beginning they want to supervise you.  At least I hope so.  Not to mention the issues of getting in and out of garb without using my dominant arm.  Postponing shoulder surgery to go do things that involve lots of heavy lifting is also stupid.  The smart choice here is to plan to give it a pass this year if we're talking about surgery.  One problem with that.

Last year we sat down with their excellencies of An Dubhaigeainn, made a plan, and volunteered to host the Runnymede dinner at this Pennsic.  Projects are underway.  We can't not be there.  I can't send Bob by himself, because I'm not really going to be able to manage by myself.  So we have to plan around Pennsic, and this fills me with trepidation.  I guess we find out more on May 1, but the timing on this ROTS.

Who knows - maybe he'll tell me that I can schedule it any time, and that waiting isn't a big deal.  Except that it HURTS, damn it.

The second bummer is looking at how little I'm going to be able to do afterwards, and for how long.  I've spent seven months in class clawing my way towards being more in shape, and I'm going to have to quit it all, cold turkey, for months.  I cannot even express how depressing that is.  I've been reading a lot of post-surgical guidelines, and naturally they vary wildly depending on the practice and the procedure, but it looks like it's going to be absolutely ages before I can go back to anything other than the treadmill or spinning (and that only in the saddle, probably.)  I know that I've done it once, and can likely do it again, and the instructors will work with me and all that, but I'm bummed.  I've worked really hard at something I despise doing, and I'm resentful that the universe sees fit to make it harder again.

When you add in the fact that I'm not going to be able to do a damn thing around the house and will be entirely dependent on Bob's standards of housekeeping...

I'm just down about the whole thing.  I realize that there's no actual good time to deal with these sorts of things, but this is just so very, very bad...

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( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
bytchearse
Apr. 15th, 2013 04:44 pm (UTC)
sigh
What this tells me is that I really should have put together that rickshaw & palanquin service at Pennsic years ago, so by now it would've been in place for you...

signed, The Unhelpful (smartass) Pelican
jdulac
Apr. 15th, 2013 06:55 pm (UTC)
what a lot of tough choices! You have my sympathy...
kls_eloise
Apr. 17th, 2013 07:45 pm (UTC)
Re: sigh
It's a lovely thought, but I suspect that a couple of stevedores and a competant lady's maid would be more useful. :-)
davidsmom1
Apr. 15th, 2013 10:28 pm (UTC)
Don't forget you have friends and we can come help you either at home or at Pennsic. While you are in CT, let me know what you need and I will happily lend a hand. It will be long and tough but you don't have to go through it alone.
kls_eloise
Apr. 17th, 2013 07:46 pm (UTC)
If we have to deal with this, I will be leaning heavily on my friends. That will possibly be the only way we'll come through it still married. :-)
kebbykate
Apr. 16th, 2013 02:36 am (UTC)
Let me know when there is surgery. I will definitely contribute to the casserole brigade. Give me some idea of what you like/can't stand and I'll cook up something.

Also, if you guys will need some weekend kid-sitting, Margaret likes playing with little kids pretty well and Elizabeth is a capable, death-preventing kid watcher.

A few thoughts about Pennsic:
Didn't you stay at a local motel the year you were pregnant? I know it's a pain to go in and out, but the comfort of a motel might be worthwhile. You could still have a daytime pavilion set up for yourself as a home base.
Also, see if you could do the PT sessions at a local PT office that week. It might be doable. Alternately, I imagine that there's a listerv or other avenue available to you where you could post to potential Pennsic attendees looking for a PT or PT assistant who might either supervise you as best as possible on site or might be in a position to suggest exercise alternatives.

And, for what it's worth, what a total bummer. I'd suggest swimming, but from what I understand rotator cuffs are the _one_ thing that swimming is not good for and is often the cause of such injuries. *sigh* I lost SIX months in the pool after my reduction surgery. When my surgeon wanted to do a little touch-up work on the scars I turned him down flat as I wasn't willing to lose the pool time.
kls_eloise
Apr. 17th, 2013 07:50 pm (UTC)
It may be that misery loves company, but I actually feel a bit better hearing about your time lost swimming. I guess there's a comfort in someone understanding *exactly* what you're peeved about.

I don't think the motel is a helpful option - the problem would be mobility and dressing and such. But the other ideas are intriguing, and something I'll look into if it comes to that.

I've had my interval of running around with my hair on fire, and I feel like I'm back in a place to be logical again. Guess I just needed to get it out of my system.
vynehorn
Apr. 16th, 2013 12:31 pm (UTC)
You're right - this really sucks, and there will never be a good time for this surgery (if surgery is in fact needed). But as others have said, you don't have to do it alone. I will be happy to cook for you, and to come over and clean the house to your specifications whenever needed. I'm not sure what to do about Pennsic, but maybe there are other options (none of them will be ideal, of course). I will ponder.

I can't help with the exercise problem, which is a bummer. At least walking will be an option. It's not like the strength training, but it will help you maintain an overall level of health and build some stamina.
kls_eloise
Apr. 17th, 2013 07:53 pm (UTC)
Obviously we'll make work whatever we need to, and if the answer IS surgery, it's going to be a crash course in leaning on my friends.

The answer may very well be "wait for the fall." It's not a good answer, but since none of them are, it falls to us to determine which is the least unpalatable.
vynehorn
Apr. 18th, 2013 12:38 am (UTC)
I understand the importance of the commitment at Pennsic, but I respectfully suggest that you have a bigger and more important commitment to yourself and your family. And do you really want to be still fairly immobile during the winter time, which could happen if you wait until the fall?

Plus, as your friend I don't like to see you in pain for any longer than is absolutely necessary.
oocdc2
Apr. 16th, 2013 02:48 pm (UTC)
Once again, I wish finances had allowed us to stay in CT, this time so we could help you in your recovery. (Reasons I wish we could have stayed crop up from time to time.) I can only send positive thoughts and hope that this conversation is, in the end, moot.
kls_eloise
Apr. 17th, 2013 07:54 pm (UTC)
Well, I need to fix it one way or the other. Chronic pain just isn't going to do it in the long term. But we'll figure it out.

If nothing else, I may get in a lot of quality reading time. :-)
oocdc2
Apr. 19th, 2013 12:16 pm (UTC)
If you do find yourself with sudden time to read, I hope you consider my humble submission. :)
kls_eloise
Apr. 24th, 2013 05:23 pm (UTC)
That's the plan. :-) But I'll get the first one on Kindle and start there. Easier to wrangle the Kindle with one hand.
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )